The Crossroads by L. Ron Hubbard (unabridged audio book performed by a full cast)

These days, the name of L. Ron Hubbard is largely connected with Scientology and the antics of some of its more "outspoken" members, overshadowing the fact that the man really knew how to tell an entertaining story and did so professionally for many years. All 150 of the short stories and novels Hubbard wrote for the pulp magazines of the 1930s and '40s are being rereleased in paperback and audiobook under the evocative title Stories from the Golden Age.

I'm focusing on the audiobooks. They are a professionally produced combination of traditional narration (deftly handled primarily by R.F. Daley) and old-time radio, with skilled actors playing the characters (often multiple roles) and genre-specific music and sound effects rounding out the experience.

The Crossroads contains three novellas. In the title story (originally published in the February 1941 issue of Unknown), Farmer Eben Smith is paid by the government for not growing crops during the "acute economic situation." But he's not paid enough, so he decides to take a load of vegetables to the city (where he's read people are starving, despite the official cries of "surplus") to see what he can get in trade.

With little idea where to go except "south," he packs up his horse Lucy's wagon and heads off, leaving wife Maria to mind the home. As night overtakes Eben and Lucy, they come to a crossroads with no clue which road to take. One road is concrete, one is full of boulders, one is shiny metal, and one simply continues the dirt road that they came on.

Perplexed by the choices, and by the fact that the sun is suddenly overhead (which he blames on the government), Eben settles down to eat lunch, take a nap, and wait for someone else to come along. And, boy, do they!

Corey Burton excels in his performance as Eben, and director Jim Meskimen once again shows the breadth of his talent by tackling five very distinct supporting roles, none of which are recognizable as the same actor. "The Crossroads" is also quite funny as Eben uses his shrewd business tactics to read each visitor and get the best deal ... for a while, anyway. Even a head for business doesn't do much against a break in the space-time continuum.

In "Borrowed Glory" (which originally appeared in the October 1941 issue of Unknown Worlds), Tuffaron the mad genie hates humans; Georgie the angel loves them. Among the angel's powers are her ability to give everything someone wants for 48 hours, after which it is all taken back except the memory of it. She believes that this is enough to impart lasting happiness, while the genie scoffs that is will only make for more misery.

They, of course, make a wager, and Georgie soon visits Meredith Smith, and aging spinster with nothing to show for her years -- no good or bad memories, just years of work and loneliness. The next 48 hours are like a fairy tale with riches, luxury, and everlasting love ... just not the way you think.

Director Tait Ruppert tackles the role of Tuffaron and four other supporting roles, while Jennifer Darling has the daunting task of having a conversation with herself as both Georgie and Meredith. R.F. Daley narrates, and Edoardo Ballerini makes for an appealing love interest as Thomas Crandall.

The final story is "Devil's Rescue." Bucko mate Edward Lanson (who was captain for 5 days after the rest of the crew died) has been floating on the open seas for 21 days. Having barely overtaken the urge toward cannibalism, he's beginning to wonder if continuing life is the right decision.

Then he is rescued by a ship that is strangely unmodern. Its captain, Vanderbeck, shows nothing but admiration for his survival skills, and Lanson is about to finally relax when a mysterious stranger comes on board, there to claim Lanson for his own.

Hubbard combines the sea adventure with the ghost story (and shades of The Seventh Seal years before that movie was released) to produce quite a ripping yarn in "The Devil's Rescue," though the ending is a bit anticlimactic. The audio is terrific, with realistic (and unobtrusive) sound effects and solid acting from the whole cast.

Narrator R.F. Daley carries the first half by getting into Lanson's head. Martin Yurchak delivers Lanson's dialogue unremarkably, but that is right for an everyman character like this. Director Jim Meskimen uses his skill with accents as Vanderbeck and two others, and Enn Reitel is suitably intimidating as the character referred to in the text only as He. His voice is an excellent combination of the debonair quality of Stephen Fry and the resonance of Christopher Lee, making Him very easy to visualize ... and fear.

All in all, The Crossroads is another fine collection of audio adaptations from the Stories from the Golden Age collection. Fans of pulp fiction and/or old-time radio will find this a highly diverting listen.

Under the Diehard Brand by L. Ron Hubbard (Western short stories audio book)

L. Ron Hubbard is probably best known as the founder of Scientology and creator of Dianetics. These days, his name is largely connected with the antics of the some of the more "outspoken" members of the religion, overshadowing the fact that the man really knew how to tell an entertaining story.

Pulp fiction fans rejoice, because there's a "new" voice on the block that deserves to be noticed. All 150 of the stories Hubbard wrote for the pulp magazines of the 1930s and '40s are being rereleased in paperback and audio under the evocative title Stories from the Golden Age.

The recordings I've tried so far are just terrific. They are a professionally produced combination of traditional narrated audiobooks (with narration deftly handled by R.F. Daley) and old-time radio, with actors playing the characters (often multiple roles) and genre-specific music and sound effects rounding out the experience.

Under the Diehard Brand is actually a collection of three short stories. In the title story (originally published in Western Aces in March 1938), Lee Thompson attempts to reunite with his father "Diehard" Thompson, the sheriff of Wolf River, Montana. But when Lee doesn't get the homecoming he's looking for, he gets involved with Holy George Gates by besting his foreman Anvil Bores in a fistfight.

Diehard thinks Holy George is behind a string of murders and stampedes, but the local businessmen appreciate the money Holy George brings into town via his large beef-cattle contracts — even if Diehard is sure it's blood money. They also think Diehard is getting old and going easy on the "real" criminals. (Rheumatism has slowed his gun hand to where he is afraid to use it.)

Corey Burton's vocal performance as Holy George is highly reminiscent of Robert Mitchum in The Night of the Hunter. But I couldn't place the accent used by actor (and Firesign Theatre alum) Phil Proctor in his role as Anvil Bores, until it brought to mind images of Boris Badenov of "moose and squirrel" fame (himself no doubt pulp-inspired).

The second story, "Hoss Tamer" (from the January 1950 issue of Thrilling Western) is a redemptive story of sorts. It is entertaining in its own way, though the conclusion is unsurprising. But the Under the Diehard Brand book and audio also contain a real discovery in its tragicomic final tale.

In "The Ghost Town Gun-Ghost" (from an August 1938 issue of Western Story), a man on the run from the law escapes to an nearly empty settlement populated only by a man named Pokey McKay. Pokey fills in the gaps of his loneliness by performing all the needed functions of the town under other names, and speaking of them in the third person. Rob Paulsen (a double Emmy winner for his work on Animaniacs) delivers a tour de force as Pokey and all his personalities.

Author L. Ron Hubbard not only tells an entertaining story, but doesn't shy away from descriptive passages that enhance the atmosphere, like the following from "Under the Diehard Brand":

He sidled up to the bar and stared at the dill pickle and aged cheese, which Long Henry was carelessly wont to call his 'free lunch'. Even so, the meager display was tantalizing to a stomach grown a stranger to food and coupled with a pocket lined only with tobacco crumbs.

There are some unintentional chuckles along the way and the occasional schmaltzy ending, but those sorts of things are to be expected. Nobody reads pulp fiction for the intellectual challenge it offers, after all. That said, Under the Diehard Brand is a highly entertaining listen.

The music and sound effects are of high quality, the actors are experienced professionals, and director Jim Meskimen orchestrates all the pieces beautifully. Galaxy Press has spent the money for a quality product, and it shows. Plus, Under the Diehard Brand gives the reader and listener three solid stories — and two real winners — for the price of one.